inconsistency, uncertainty and trust

When a person becomes inconsistent about their thoughts, it may prompt you to believe that he is unreliable and therefore poses some level of uncertainty towards your future together, and whether or not you can trust him.

I tend to believe that a person can be inconsistent about his/her thoughts, as long as these inconsistencies are small and superficial. It shouldn't be a surprise that our thoughts and feelings can sway as we progress in a relationship, assuming these aren't fundamental changes, such as our beliefs or our commitment toward each other. Our inconsistencies are nothing more than a minor blemish that make us human. However, someone can be very consistent in what they say and think, yet it tells you nothing about whether you can trust that person, other than he/she is a sharp and disciplined thinker. They are the people you want on your research team, or work on a project together, because it leverages that particular strength, which is important. But to assess whether someone is trustworthy and reliable based mainly on this factor will only give you erroneous results. Looking back at your previous relationships, have you applied this gauge and deemed one reliable and trustworthy, only to be disappointed?

There were times when you were inconsistent, yet that didn't obscure my perception of who you are. Our lives are anything but stationary, especially for someone like you who has to process 99 thoughts at any given moment, to think that you won't change your mind on anything is just absurd. So for me to lose faith in you just because you've changed your mind will be a very bad reflection upon myself. Just like people who cheat are afraid others will cheat, people who are acutely aware of other people's inconsistencies may themselves be inconsistent, and this behavior is simply a reflection of their own insecurity.

Most of the time, walking away does not solve the problem. We need to reexamine how we assess a person and stay away from the same quagmire so we don't end up miserable and disappointed.